Fighting a much bigger opponent

[Ragsbo]

A restraining order will not do anything if the guy still wants to hurt you or her, but it will show that she was scared of bodily harm from this person and has seek official help in dealing with him so if it does get physical it could help with the legal issues.

I would also recommend obeying the rule of the 3 "S"s
1. Don't got STUPID places (where you know he might be)
2. With STUPID people (hopefully that is self explanatory)
3. And do STUPID stuff (if he shows up, leave)

[bae]

Originally Posted by Ragsbo

I would also recommend obeying the rule of the 3 "S"s
1. Don't got STUPID places (where you know he might be)
2. With STUPID people (hopefully that is self explanatory)
3. And do STUPID stuff (if he shows up, leave)

Originally Posted by HarvKY

P.S. always be cautious of others (especially females) manipulating you into situations where you need not be

Listen to the two gentlemen above :-)

[jflail2]

Surely is motivation to train harder and longer! Odds are, I'll never see the guy, but I'd like to be mentally prepared for a worst case scenario.

I like the WT crew. Definitely a no bones about it crowd that supplies able/down to earth advice. Your thoughts and feedback are very much appreciated.

[William Carter]

Plus 1 for restraining order ect. It might sound whimpy, but it paves the way for you to be "afraid for your life", in which case (depending on state laws) you might have more rights legally, to use more force to defend yourself.

Nothing wrong with BJJ but for something to learn quickly, you just need to practice basics. IE: eye jab, knee, elbow, head butt, if done right, kicks to knee, and just build speed. Usually 1 of these moves will make an opening for the other. Like others said, cheat to win. Your height does not sound little to me, but using your build to your advantage and his build to your advantage. In other words, you are probably faster than the other guy. Using your body type to lead your fighting style is underated, IMO.

While UFC is not street fighting there is much to be learned from watching it. Anderson Silva for example make use of his tallish slim frame. Knees and elbows from him lay waste to much stronger guys. No high kicks.

You have the advantage in knowing the fight is comming. For me in a street fight, (in my younger days) the quickest way to get a big guy off me is the small hidden knife. Again check state laws, but if you are afraid for your life, or your girlfriends, then it's war. Nowdays, for me a street fight is always war, because, I will not fight over anything petty like getting cut off in traffic.

If you work on just these few basic things, and try to go 1st, you will do ok. No matter how big a person is, eyes, throat, nuts and kneecaps are prime targets. A lot of big guys like to bum rush.

Let us know how it goes. Good posability the old boyfriend is all mouth.

[HamburgO]

There are arguments for and against this, but statistically, restraining orders are a) hard to enforce, and b) have escalated the propensity for violence especially in domestic disputes (ex-husbands, boyfriends). The conventional wisdom from LE is to get one, lawyers get paid to file them, but private security firms like deBecker, who have a lot of experience with stalking, will often counsel against them. I would give it a lot of thought and get some different opinions from experts in this type of case before going for it.

Regarding the fighting a bigger guy question... I'm big (too big), and not the strongest, roughest, toughest, guy in town, but have seen advantages both psychologically and physically (weight, reach) in fighting or sparring with smaller guys, even if they were in much better shape (unless they were really tough and fast like my last boxing trainer. Could never get my hands on that guy!) . Your best bet is to not get into it, but if you do, throw in everything you got: kick balls, thumb eyes, bite, rip at his throat, scratch, pepper-spray, hit him over the head with a hard object, several times! If on top of being bigger, he displays a weapon, oh well...

As others have said, avoid it. Be safe! Don't go places you're likely to run into him. Watch your six. Secure her residence. Call the cops if he shows up.

[jflail2]

Thanks very much William, that was good stuff. I'm taking Muay Thai as well for the striking side of things, and I can definitely see an increase in the speed/power of my strikes.

Hopefully it won't go at all! I do however now see a very practical purpose for my training, whereas before it was just for fitness. I think it's going to be good to have the additional "self preservation motivator".

[chipw]

Id keep doing the BJJ and Muay Thai. Id drop the soccer league for some extra mat time doing your BJJ and thai boxing.

If you get good at those things id say your going to be pretty dangerous to an untrained guy, big or not.

If you've got extra time that doesn't correspond to the time your BJJ/MT classes are offered than take up some kind of condition program similar to crossfit/mountain athlete/military athlete ect.
my .02

[jstn417]

+1 on avoidance and situational awareness.

If he does show up somewhere tell him you are not looking for trouble and try to walk away. Do not turn your back, you don't want a sucker punch in the back of the coconut. IF he pursues you have to quickly decide if you are going to attack or not. If you are tell your girl to call the cops as you are walking away (hell even if you are not going to attack). A lot of times the person that calls first is considered the victim. Myself I am 5'8" 190 and have had this same thing happen to me before, but add steroid using gorilla. In my case my youthful ignorance blinded me to the fact that she was using me to kick this guys head in so he would leave her alone. When you decide to go don't telegraph with a stance or trash talk...nothing. Be brutal, most guys out there are trying to knock you out or break your nose. That is winning to them. You better get the mentality that was so well said before that it is war. You need to be trying to put him on a gurney until he backs down or neutralize him. In my case he did when I hit him in the throat and tried to kick his knee cap through to the backside. A lesson learned from this was afterwards she wouldn't talk to me anymore because "I was crazy." In hindsight good riddance. Just some food for thought.

No offense, but think long and hard if this girl is worth getting your head caved in for because it is a possibility.

Hope nobody takes this as horn tooting. Have a lot of respect for the warriors on here.

[GOP]

Most likely nothing will come of this. Girls play these games. My advice -

Keep training.

Gain weight/strength/improve your fitness.

Decide if this girl is legit and worth keeping.

Decide if the guy is a legit threat or just a trash talker.

[twinboysdad]

BTDT and listen closely little brother, once you have had your fair share of the "good stuff" you will realize that it is about all the same and none is worth dying over, jail, ect. ALSO you sound like a good guy, don't you deserve someone with no baggage? Lots of good girls out there with none of the drama. Might not be her fault, but I have been in the same situations and was getting used everytime. You do not want a woman that needs to be rescued. I promise you I am not wrong on this one. Best of luck to you and if you stay with her, make sure you know what he looks like...