View Full Version : recipe to keep the ladies in your life happy, a sure thing

12-22-2011, 01:40 PM
Ok gentlemen, Im feeling especially giving this year so here you go. Do not tell your lady about how easy this is, it will loose all of the Majic:)

The women I work with call this "Panties Off Pie" because they absolutely love it and are more than willing to respond in a very positive manner.

And its Glock simple

Oreo Cookie pie crust- do not screw this up, you need REAL Oreo cookie pie crusts for this Trust me!!!!

Chocolate Fudge Instant Pudding- Jello 1 box per pie
Butterscotch Instant Pudding- Jello 1 box per pie
Vanilla- real type not extract- 1 tsp or so, per pie
Dream Whip- 2 envelopes per pie
Milk- as cold as you can get it, preferably just north of freezing
Cool Whip- large container

Mix 1 cup cold milk with the dream whip and vanilla, whip until you get a stiff peak ( in the dream whip perverts)

Add both packages of pudding, (making sure you didnt screw up and get cook and serve and not instant) and 1 3/4 cups more cold milk

Mix on high until mixed , then spoon into pie shell. Take the clear plastic top cover off the shell FIRST.

If you feel like teasing her, sneak her a spoonful while its still in the bowl)

Chill in freezer for 3 hours, then frost with REAL Cool Whip

This is the real deal here boys, it has started fights at my office parties. Simple, easy, fast and tastes great. The ladies absolutely love it.

Good for a decadent breakfast surprise for her as well, if it lasts that long.

Dave Sauer
12-22-2011, 01:52 PM
I will not be trying this as I my lady already keeps me too busy and tired to do all the shooting I want. :grin:

12-22-2011, 02:36 PM
Brother, all I can say is give it a try.

I did and I was AMAZED at the result. And its a home grown experiment too. You wont need the whiskey, maybe a sifter of Brandy, get the good stuff to cap it off.........


12-22-2011, 03:02 PM

Just pullin' some chain bro. Best to you and yours for Christmas.


12-22-2011, 03:21 PM
Here's how that would go down at my house. I'd make the thing and present it to the wife. Wife would accuse me of trying to sabotage her diet, get mad, and storm out. Kids and I would eat the pie. One piece would be left in the fridge. Wife would eat it at midnight, but never admit to it. Wife would then hate herself for eating pie, and not feel like boom boom for a week.

The biggest aphrodisiac in this house is four boys in their own beds.

12-22-2011, 03:25 PM
From the thread title I thought the recipe was going to be like this:

Manly man + getting **** done in life + successful self-selected career + affection = happy woman.

My situation would play out much the same way SPQR's would. Sabotage diet -> feel insecure about eating pie -> unhappy woman -> no fun.

12-22-2011, 03:33 PM
D.....I'm trying to learn here.....is there whisky in your scenario, and if so, what became of it?:dunno:

Yes... After the kids went to bed, but before the midnight pie eating, I'd sample a variety of single malts and bourbons. When I sidled off to hit the rack would be when the midnight pie eating would occur. :-)

Grey Man
12-22-2011, 04:29 PM
Making pie to get "attention" ?

I guess some guys need all the help they can get :razz:

12-22-2011, 04:54 PM
I so glad Im single

And not worried about the diet sabotage....

Well, best of the holidays to all anyway

Gabriel Suarez
12-22-2011, 05:01 PM

And I thought all I needed was a fire, soft music and a few mojitos.

12-22-2011, 05:05 PM
The biggest aphrodisiac in this house is four boys in their own beds.

Awesome. I can relate.

12-22-2011, 05:06 PM
"Panties off Pie"

are you SURE it works THAT way!?!?!!?

ADDED: wait a minute you don't have to bake this particular pie?

12-22-2011, 10:17 PM
You had me anticipating some great miracle whan you quoted "a sure thing", but I think a combination of Gabe's idea and the OP's may work.

12-23-2011, 07:13 AM
I have found that it is really helpful to begin with a Woman that wants to be happy in the first place.

There lots of them that aren't really happy no matter what. The best they hope for is to be making someone else's life miserable.
Don't ask me how I know about this. :facepalm2:

12-23-2011, 07:57 AM
Amateurs. All you need to get a ladies panties off is a couple of drinks. And 3-4 Rohypnols. :eek:

Though in culinary school I did some Grand Marnier infused tuxedo strawberries. After three, one of my classmates (who was also a semi-professional model) was out of her chef jacket and had her shirt tied off like a halter, slurring "is it hot in here?" Why yes. Yes it is.

If you got the patience, those things work magic on a woman's lady bits.

12-23-2011, 03:30 PM
I have sent several behind the walls for long stays for that very recipe. They now must concern themselves with keeping thier own panties pulled up.

It starts out being amazing how often inmates get panties in prison. Then you get used to seeing it and stop thinking about it too much. :dunno:

As far as whether this recipe works or not, well I'm not the one to say with my track record.

12-23-2011, 04:45 PM
Wait until you get old. The wife swinging her panties on her finger is more challenge than invite !!!!!!


Dave Sauer
12-23-2011, 04:48 PM
Wait until you get old. The wife swinging her panties on her finger is more challenge than invite !!!!!!


That is hilarious! I've got to write that one down.

12-30-2011, 12:07 PM
I do the cooking around here. Probably why I always get what I want, when I want it. Of course, a nice fire and 4 sleeping sons doesn't hurt here either, wife doesn't drink much, but she likes it when i do.

12-30-2011, 01:30 PM
I can assure all of the Gentlemen here that alfredo sauce ruins the elastic in panties.
1/2 stick of butter
1/4 pound of ham
1 pint of cream
1/2 pound of mozzarella cheese
Steak and or Chicken breasts hot off the grill to top it off.
Add these ingrediants one slow step at a time while she watches and the Pasta boils.
I can assure you, this works every time.