View Full Version : When was the last time you did something stupid?

02-08-2005, 05:37 PM
No, I mean recently - not "back when." One of the remarks in the Ninety percent of the danger out there... (http://www.warriortalk.com/showthread.php?t=6119) thread got me to thinking. Specifically one of the remarks about "not letting ego get in the way" or somesuch. And yep, I gotta plead "guilty." I don't know if ego is exactly the right word, but here's what happened...

It was late last summer on a Sunday afternoon. All in all a quite unremarkable day. I taught Sunday School that morning, attended services (can't remeber what the sermon was on, but I'm pretty sure it never touched on "go threaten to beat the crap outta somebody"), stopped for lunch then headed home. After getting home, the wife remembered something we needed from WallyWorld - since I needed gas anyway, I offered to run up there. Now, our local WallyWorld is a couple blocks from some recently built subsidized housing - and some of the clientele reflect that. As I was pulling into the parking lot, a couple "disadvantaged youths" decided to jump into the crosswalk as I was halfway through it, nearly resulting in me hitting them. They slapped my hood and said a few *ahem* impolite things about my driving abilities, ancestory, etc. I usually just ignore this sort of thing, but this time I didn't. (No, I don't know why - it hadn't been a bad day or anything - I just decided I wasn't going to let it pass.) I said a few things back to them that could only be considered as less than charitable. They then started carrying on about what they'd do to me if I was out of the car... *Sigh* I whipped into a parking space, (discreetly) pulled my KelTec out of my pocket and stuffed under the seat, and indicated they should "bring it on." Now I should interject here that I'm 5'4" about 135# - overall, especially in dress shirt and pleated pants I look about as intimidating as the Easter Bunny. Nonetheless, our "disadvantaged youths" backed down - pronto. I actually saw them inside the store a few minutes later, and they immediately turned and headed the other way. I've no idea what posessed me that day. I just didn't feel like taking any crap for some reason. Fortunately, it had a happy ending. But to paraphrase Dr. Phil, "What the he** was I thinkin'?" Oh, but and I guess this is where the "ego thing" comes in - ya' know what? It felt pretty good...

02-08-2005, 06:11 PM
Maybe they thought you were crazy. :cool:

I wouldn't expect you could get away with that twice.

02-08-2005, 08:32 PM
I have found a number of times that it is more beneficial for "them" to think you are crazy than to think you are bad.

02-09-2005, 02:40 AM
I wouldn't expect you could get away with that twice.Nope. I reckon that was my "freebie."

02-09-2005, 06:00 AM
Here is mine from just about 1 year ago.

Well this happened 1:45 AM Saturday.
I was tired and decided to call it a night, so I went downstairs to shut off lights and check doors. I peek outside and see a White Cadillac with big ass chrome wheels parked parallel to the road blocking the entrance to my driveway. Car is running two people in it. Now mind you it's 1:45 AM and this is usually a quiet neighborhood. Alarm bells are going off in my head. Just as I'm processing this in my head they backup a little pop the trunk and pull up in my driveway. Now here is where I get stupid. I open the front door lift my sweater establish a grip on my pistol and boldly walk out there to confront. I loudly yelled HEY! They back up out of my driveway pull down the road 50 yards with the trunk still open, stop, and then a female passenger exits the car and places something in the trunk and yells sorry to me.
This could have gone bad in so many ways, what a dope I am.

You know the really bad thing is on another Michigan message board, myself Jim ******* and a couple of other people discussed this type of scenario thoroughly. I know that in the legal sense going outside you are on very very thin ice, really it's more like open water. However, for some reason that didn't stop me. Hopefully this will stick in the forefront of my mind in case I have a similar recurrence.

This was asked by another person in the original thread:
Did you get a discription of both people in the car and most importantly did you get the license number? If not you blew the most important part.

My response:
I did stop short of chasing them down the street, so no plate number. I was barefoot in the snow. And beyond the fact that one was female no description. Looking back on it they probably were guests of one of my trashy neighbors the demographics fit. If it was indeed an innocent act hopefully they can see how a car pulling into your drive at 2:00 AM and popping open the trunk is going to put someone on edge. They didn't just pull into the entrance like you do when turning around, they pulled all the way to the top of my drive! I didn't bother with the police as a white caddy w/ chrome wheels and two african americans in it is not a real useful description in Kentwood.
(No flames I'm far from racist, this is just a statement of fact)

Marc "Crafty Dog" Denny
02-09-2005, 07:16 AM
Woof All:

Concerning MK96's post which starts this thread:

Try this on for size:

In terms of evolutionary biology/psychology, aggression is an instinct. It WILL express. Modern PC theory seeks to elimate the expression of agression through the elimination of eliciting stimuli. This effort WILL fail, but will succeed in making the discharge of the aggressive drive unpredictable. Analogy: Eliminating eliciting stimuli to sexual urges will lead to a nocturnal emission. ;-)

In nature Aggression has 3 purposes: Territory, hierarchy, reproduction (2 males over female, female in defense of young).

Social animals (groups in which members can distinguish each other-- not, e.g. a school of minnows) have hierarchy and have aggression.

Evolutionarily speaking the human animal is meant to live within social units wherein everyone knows everyone-- commonly known as a tribe-- yet due to cultural evolution proceeding at a pace far quicker than genetic evolution, the modern world is one often at substantial variance from the one in which our genetic makeup evolved.

In a tribe, to accept disrespect is to have one's hierarchical status diminished-- which also tends to diminish one's reproductive options ;-) In short, our natural genetic response to disrespect is pretty much as described in the story which begins this thread and which is why it felt so da*n good.

The problem in the modern world is that many of our interactions are in the context of anonymity-- with people we do not know and with whom we will probably never interact again. In many of these situations, the "smart thing" to do is to ignore the disrespect, yet our the true natural response is to respond. The psychic costs of the tension between this two (doing the smart thing, doing the natural thing) can be quite considerable.

One possible solution is to find discharge of the Aggressive drive in the ritual space and anchor it there with morality while preparing oneself for those moments when it is called upon in service of man's function as Protector. Dog Brothers Real Contact Stickfighting is an example of this.

Not only does the discharge of aggression in a moral ritual space prevent an accumulation of the aggressive juices (which eventually our mind will create situations justifying its release just as our mind will create a dream triggering a nocturnal emission) but it also gives us a genuine self-knowledge that protects us from a poisonous self-doubt that can come from walking away and wondering if the truth was really that one was being a coward.

Crafty Dog/Marc

PS: Concerning wifely commentary (see. Cameron's post) You may know of the old philosophical question: "If a tree falls in a forest and there is no one there to hear it, is there a sound and how do you know?"

The updated version: "If two men are having a conversation and there is no woman to hear them, are they still wrong?"

02-09-2005, 07:21 AM
I live in a town that has a very expensive boarding school that occupies 50 or 100 acres (perhaps even more; I have no idea where the back of the property is) on one side of Main St. and a pizza shop and a video store (and not much else) on the other side of Main St. These charming children, who come from very advantaged families, take great glee in waiting until a car has almost reached the crosswalk and then stepping out in front of it. Also, the one traffic signal in town has a verrrrry long red for the side street and a very short green that shows up eventually. They love to wait until the short green before crossing verrrrrry slowly in front of a long line of cars, resulting in only one or two actually getting through the intersection. On occasion, they've been so slow about it that no cars got through.

Lou Costello
02-09-2005, 07:42 AM
In my neighborhood when the kids 'stroll' across the street, it's usually an indicator of a carjacking setup. The good citizen slows or stops and his attention is diverted to the boys in front. Up from the back comes the carjackers and things go to hell from there.

Another technique is to stretch a piece of bright yellow construction tape across the street. Every driver stops when he comes to the tape barrier. Same thing happens.

The BG's used to use chain but found that bright yellow construction tape works just as well. People automatically stop.

I'm talking narrow, city streets here.

02-09-2005, 08:11 AM
"When was the last time you did something stupid?"

Wrong question. Too many times a day to keep count! But, as far as displaying overt aggression, not recently.

I almost always can get along with almost everyone. Couple of recent exceptions. There is a commercial on TV, I think it is for Netscape. the actor is short, needs a shave badly, and he is somebody well known, I think. I have to turn the channel when the commercial comes on because I react to him so strongly I am afraid I might throw something at the screen. Very unusal reaction for me.

The other day an extremely unpopular rookie building inspector was looking over a project I am engineering. I had to look away from him a number of times because I kept having the urge to walk over to him and whack him soundly about the head and shoulders with my cane. No special reason, he just is so stupid it is offensive. I am aware some other people have the same reaction to him.

I have decided to avoid being on the site with him whenever possible.

Now that I have confessed to all of this, I wonder where these reactions come from. I tend to look to myself first, but these two characters engender similar reacitons in other people. Is it that they are begging to be victims? You could easily see that in a logger, cowboy or biker bar, they would have small chance of finishing their first beer before somebody lowered the boom on them, just because.

Marc, help! Why would someone want to be a victim? What is the payoff in this behavior? (Third Law of Thermodynamics, there has to be a payoff for all behvior.)

God bless and y'all be mindful out there.

02-09-2005, 12:06 PM
reference this thread as examples of just how much we should reconsider our decision to have a firearm for protection.

02-09-2005, 12:54 PM

I have read of persons in prison being shown films of persons to see who they would "ping" as possible victims for crimes and to see if the same persons were constantly picked.

IIRC the study showed that the same persons were picked over and over and when interviewed the prisoners it was based on body language and visual cues.

No I do not have a link, does anyone else?

02-09-2005, 01:53 PM
Here's an exhaustive look at victimology. I didn't read a lot of it, but it looks good. There's 8 chapters there:

www.crimelibrary.com/criminal_mind/profiling/victimology/2.html?sect=20 (http://www.crimelibrary.com/criminal_mind/profiling/victimology/2.html?sect=20)

Cold War Scout
02-09-2005, 01:55 PM
Crafty hits a significant nail right on the head. The dichotomy between what we should do in modern society, versus what our very physical essence commands us to do. That is why "losing face" is so powerful a stimuli that compels emotional behavior from us that we know we mentally know we should be above doing even as we are doing it. And yet we still feel emotionally good that we did it. There are very few things more humiliating than being publicly punked out, especially in front of your woman and your children. Perhaps this is not a positive statement I am about to make about myself, but I know there have been instances in my life where I preferred death to punking out.

combat engineer
02-10-2005, 06:41 AM
this is not something stupid, but along the lines of the previous posts....

Several months ago a local "known" crack-head approached me for money as I was getting in my car. He gave me the same story about his church van breaking down that he gave me last time, and finally after explaining why I couldn't help him, he left me alone.

A couple of weeks ago he tried to approach me again. I gave him the worst "I'm gonna kill you" look I could muster and he turned away. It felt awesome to have diverted his "attack", as opposed to feeling like a wuss and trying to "negotiate" with him.

No point here really, just sharing my experiences. Feel free to comment/critique

02-10-2005, 02:26 PM
Is it possible that the responsibility of carrying a firearm tempers some of the natural aggressive feelings?

Seems like the more confident and in control one feels, the less chance of being drawn into "honor" combat.

02-10-2005, 02:57 PM
I believe those of us who carry weapons and believe in what is "right and good" fight an internal battle when one of these situations comes along. The "right and good" part, along with ego motivates us to make a correction to what is happening.

The other intelectual and self preservation part realizes that what normally (without weapons) could have a bad ending which might be a split lip, also understands that when a weapon gets thrown into the mix, whether intentionally or not, the bad ending could have much more grave consequences.

pete f
02-22-2005, 11:39 PM
Although I am now more able to "back up" my bluster in a situation because of my CCW, I find myself walking away from situations where in the past i might have stepped up and said "you talking to me?!?" A fear of having to use my gun. A fear of the resulting lawsuit, personal pain it would cause my family, etc etc, have made me far less likely to step and act in challenging manner. This is not to say that I will not use my gun when the time comes. But rather that I choose not hasten the arrival of that time.

I used to bounce at a local night club in my days and now I am a contractor who does property management. I have had a lot of experience with people trying to get into my face. Lately when it has happened I just smile and give a look like you don't know how close you just came..... and walk away. the funny thing is...after I do this, the people become much more subdued around me. Almost as though my confidence and disregard for their animosity shakes their confidence to the core. And they become much more polite around me, reducing the level of bad language and aggressive behavior toward me by full levels of degrees.
Has anyone else noticed this. That a reposed strength has a deterence factor all its own? It is almost as though they realize gees he could kill me at anytime, I better behave.

02-23-2005, 06:41 AM
In my neighborhood when the kids 'stroll' across the street, it's usually an indicator of a carjacking setup. The good citizen slows or stops and his attention is diverted to the boys in front. Up from the back comes the carjackers and things go to hell from there.

Another technique is to stretch a piece of bright yellow construction tape across the street. Every driver stops when he comes to the tape barrier. Same thing happens.

The BG's used to use chain but found that bright yellow construction tape works just as well. People automatically stop.

I'm talking narrow, city streets here.

What part of NJ do you live in?? I used to live in Burlington county.