View Full Version : Just lift.

Greg Nichols
08-03-2018, 09:23 PM
Ok, gang this is a bit of a personal message so it might be a little dis-jointed but I'm going to do my best because its worthwhile and I'm a little emotionally compromised.

I have a little chubby buddy that's getting divorced, suicidal, depressed. Dont judge me but I responded with........... lift. Sad, lift. Depressed, lift. Angry, lift. Murderous, lift. Dont medicate, lift. And then I called him. I informed him that he is a good person and if he had to pillow down at night with the shady shit from my history he would be ok. Hes never done a bad thing to anyone, ever. I can't let this one get away.

I gave carte blanche to call. What more can I do? Not losing someone who's never done shit to anyone...

Mike Heckathorn
08-03-2018, 09:28 PM
Skype/FaceTime is a good thing.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

08-03-2018, 10:56 PM
Take him with you. If necessary, by the stacking swivel.

Gabriel Suarez
08-04-2018, 06:25 AM
The day you stop looking forward is the day you begin to age and die.

08-04-2018, 07:40 AM
Greg, the lifting advice is great.

There are times in life when it isn't wise/safe to be alone with one's thoughts. An idle/wandering mind will default to the recent tragedy (whatever that may be). Keeping the mind occupied is critical, a new hobby, work, talking to a buddy, a blaring TV set, a crossword puzzle...whatever it takes to keep the noodle from slipping into the pit.

Also, you call him. He probably won't call you as often as he needs to. If he's geographically close, drag him out and get him doing stuff. Lifting would be great but anything is fine.

08-04-2018, 07:40 AM
Take him with you. If necessary, by the stacking swivel.

Hell, Yeah.

All a man needs in this life is someone to love.
If you can't give him that,
Give him something to hope for.
If you can't give him that,
Give him something to do.

Your friend definitely falls into the latter catagory, and Lifting has no destructive downsides. Though some (no one here, I suspect ) would think it inappropriate advice, It is spot on. Stay involved and be an unwavering fixed point in his life for now. This is vitally important.

Though I am blessed in the fact that I've never lived through first hand what your friend is embroiled in, I lived through it blow by blow with my best life long friend. He also in the 300# club. His Ex took a nuclear strike sized shit on him. It practically destroyed him. He wisely reached out to me. There were long walks, and many cigars involved in his healing process. It took 6 months for the divorce to come to light, and people remarked how well he was taking it. The truth was it took him 6 months to chisel out his game face for the occasion.

He is celebrating his 10th wedding anniversary on Sept 1 this year. He now has 2 boys, 8 & 6, and a fantastic Navy veteran for a Wife.

Greg, You are most definitely doing the right thing.

chad newton
08-04-2018, 08:41 AM
Just stay on top of him, I lost a best my best friend 2 years ago Christmas. Him and his brother were the closest thing I had to brothers. 33 years old is way to young and it happened to someone I thought would outlive me. It will be hard on you if you don’t keep trying. That’s all we can do bro....

08-04-2018, 08:54 AM
Good on you Greg. Sometimes a man needs a brother. Thanks for stepping up.

08-04-2018, 10:40 AM
Totally agree with your idea/thoughts/therapy. Keeping in mind that there are many paths to the top of the mountain - my saving grace has always been kata. Sometimes kata til the point of physical exhaustion. Kata in strange places and at strange times. Kata. Same concept - and it works. I am living proof. Emphasis on living. Good luck.

geezer john

08-04-2018, 11:30 AM
Here another vote to take him with you. I did just that last week, but it's my son facing possible divorce instead of a good friend. We didn't get much of a workout because it ended up being an hour and a half talk, but I'm okay with that.

be there for him, take him to the gym..

08-05-2018, 06:35 PM
Everything seems to have been said...but invest time with him..physically if possible...
Keep him from bogging down into his own head...keep moving forward.
Keep in the fight

08-05-2018, 06:40 PM
+1. Lift. Talk. Lift some more. Run fast.

Stay connected with him.

Mr. Anthony
08-05-2018, 08:12 PM
May or may not be something to share with your buddy, but it's a good fitness guide and made me laugh.


08-06-2018, 07:30 AM
I like to spend some time in nature when I am getting down.

Hike up a mountain, watch the sunset. Spend the night, and watch the sunrise.

Bob F.
11-08-2018, 07:21 PM
Very intense National Registry Paramedic class w/ "extras" back in the dark ages; intense as 25 students, 7 divorces. Advice was "when you're hurting on the inside, do something for the outside." Hike, bike ride, LIFT, swim, lift, whatever.