Homeschooling

[emtdaddy1980]

I'm not sure if this is the appropriate place for this this thread or not so admin please move if appropriate.

Ive decided to begin homeschooling my two older boys ages 13 and 11 beginning this coming school year. If theres anyone in the trive already doing this I would appreciate any tips or advice you have to offer.

Thank you.

[coastalcop]

Make sure they have LOTS of interaction with peers outside the home. Stats suggest that folks who homeschool (seriously, not trying to get out of truancy charges for their out of control kids) have a FAR better education than those in public school. HOWEVER they tend to be more socially awkward and less adaptive to change. Especially at the age that social and physical challenges become so important to development.

I changed schools practically yearly (.MIL brat) but could adapt to anything. went DOD, private, and public school. I could adapt to anything quickly, but the education was lacking (dad had homeschool assignments to fill in the gaps).

Far beyond actual education, the ability to adapt and integrate into a peer group is usually more important to actual professional success (who vs what you know) having both is just icing on the cake

[WinstonSmith]

Just like anything else, you get out what you put in.

I am a fan of "classical education" models (based on the trivium), and if you can find a homeschool co-op, all the better. I've seen homeschool co-ops that are basically a private school for 2.5 days a week (Tues AM/PM, Wed AM/PM, Thurs AM). It's the best of both homeschool and private school. Quality teachers to guide the work, student still works at home with parents, but selecting the literature and doing the assessment (grading) is all taken care of by the co-op. Students get social interaction time, some extracurricular activities (P.E., some sports, music/art, etc.). Plus you always get guaranteed 4 day weekends to take the family on trips without concern. And you'd be surprised how much dedicated students with committed parents can learn in 2.5 days a week plus homework time compared to the 5 day per week babysitting service also known as "public schools."

We moved away from that one, otherwise our kids would be there today.

[tact999]

We just started this past year. We used the Texas K12 which was essentially funded by the state. While it certainly was a step up from what they were getting, we are still not impressed and are currently searching for another alternative.

Winston, I appreciate your perspective and information on the coop. Unfortunately we live in a remote area and it is not possible here. Any other suggestions would certainly be welcomed.

[WinstonSmith]

We just started this past year. We used the Texas K12 which was essentially funded by the state. While it certainly was a step up from what they were getting, we are still not impressed and are currently searching for another alternative.

Winston, I appreciate your perspective and information on the coop. Unfortunately we live in a remote area and it is not possible here. Any other suggestions would certainly be welcomed.

There are some programs out there that you can use with similar families to start your own co-ops on a smaller scale. I'm extremely leery of this concept in general, because there are a lot of families out there that do homeschooling just to hide from "the gubmit" ... and in general I want nothing to do with them. But there are some decent programs out there (some are not cheap, which is both good and bad), so if you have friends that are considering doing this, find a good program and link up.

[LawDog]

HOWEVER they tend to be more socially awkward and less adaptive to change. Especially at the age that social and physical challenges become so important to development.While this belief seems logical and intuitive, we now have a large enough body of data to analyze that it has been proven wrong. In college and graduate school, the home-schooled kids are more likely to be elected to leadership positions; more likely to be identified as "popular" by their peers; and self-report higher levels of social happiness. It turns out that the preconceived idea that we all had of the socially-awkward, home-schooled misfit was actually all wrong. There are a few disaster stories, and there are the idiot families who claim to home-school but are really providing no-school, but in 99% of the home-school scenarios there appear to be no negatives attached to the decision. Home-schooling is an all-around win.

I don't have any kids. I've chosen to have vacations and freedom instead. So it is easy for me to hypothesize about how parenting should be done. Because of this, I usually keep my mouth shut, since nobody wants the childless people to tell them how to raise their kids. I have a lot of education, though, and I've been exposed to a lot of home-schooled students who progressed to higher levels of education. My experience with home-schooled students is universally positive. If someone was debating home-schooling their kid, and their concern was whether they would be creating an awkward nerd, I would tell them to not worry about it at all. Keep your kids at home. Raise them right and teach them the truth. They'll get plenty of peer group integration on the football field or gymnastics class.

[eldon54]

I used Time4Learning.com with my older daughter for 4th grade. I thought it was a good program and would have worked fine if my daughter had been more motivated and less attention deficit. If I didn't watch her like a hawk, she would just click through the lessons without really reading them just so they would be marked as finished. Then, when she got to the tests, she didn't really know the information. I thought the material was slanted left, but no worse than what's in the public schools. If your kids are motivated to learn, then they should do fine.

There is also Freedomproject http://freedomproject.com which sounds promising. Much more traditional.

[Trenchs]

I highly recommend it. We homeschool our daughter and she loves it. She goes to a CO-OP once a week at our church to get a "class room" experience but with the internet and growth of pre-packaged curriculum it is very easy to access a quality education.

[WinstonSmith]

While this belief seems logical and intuitive, we now have a large enough body of data to analyze that it has been proven wrong. In college and graduate school, the home-schooled kids are more likely to be elected to leadership positions; more likely to be identified as "popular" by their peers; and self-report higher levels of social happiness. It turns out that the preconceived idea that we all had of the socially-awkward, home-schooled misfit was actually all wrong. There are a few disaster stories, and there are the idiot families who claim to home-school but are really providing no-school, but in 99% of the home-school scenarios there appear to be no negatives attached to the decision. Home-schooling is an all-around win.

I think part of the stereotype comes from those (typically uber-conservative Christian) families that really pushed homeschooling their kids back in the 1980s. What the rest of us may fail to realize is that those families would have had anti-social, nerdy kids even if they were went to school at a shopping mall full of valley girls and MTV. A large part of that social behavior is learned by modeling through the parents. Or as the old adage goes: the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[Gabriel Suarez]

I DID NOT homeschool....but neither did I send them to GOV PRISON SCHOOLS. There are plenty of alternatives to both. I will now stay out of any further involvement in this emotional and zealous discussion.

[mike135]

Long-time and passionate homeschooler here... both experienced it for myself (first 5 years at home, then 3 years public, then 4 years private) and doing it with my kids (as is pretty much every parent I spend much time with socially).

Many of the traditional objections have been proven to be illegitimate. Sure, there are bad stories to be found, but as has been said already it's all about the parents. Ultimately a kid is a reflection on the parent no matter what school they attend. Homeschooling just gives you the opportunity to have a much bigger influence on your kids, while eliminating a lot of the negative influence. The biggest influence on many kids is their peers, which is the last thing I want for my kid.

Think about it this way--do you want your kid to be a kid, or do you want them to develop into an adult? If the dominant influence is other kids, it doesn't help them become an adult. If the dominant influence is adults, it's a much more efficient progression to adulthood. The faster they become adults (in regards to maturity and character), the sooner they can get on with a full and productive life. When I was in 9th grade everybody thought I was a senior, because of the way I spoke and handled myself. Your kid can have a very full social experience without the retarded development of maturity and character that is prevalent in their peers.

As far as I am concerned, the academic basics can be knocked out in a small fraction of the time they would occupy in a traditional school environment. That frees up their time for the good stuff--developing and pursuing their passions and interests and getting a 4+ year head-start on college and life. Homeschooling + good parenting opens up worlds of opportunity that would otherwise be inaccessible due to countless hours of useless class time and homework.

In regards to social development, I think the best way a kid learns in the early years is with siblings close in age to them. We are most familiar with those we know best, so if you can get your kids to get along nicely then there's no issues getting along with others. Beyond that, the opportunities for social interaction through homeschool groups, athletic teams, and other hobby-based groups is huge today, and the supervision tends to be much better there than in the traditional public school environment anyway.

In regards to curriculum, it's getting overwhelmed because the market is getting flooded with options. I'm going to a big convention in Orlando next month and I've heard it's impossible to take it all in over a couple days. Just remember that being a good parent and taking control of your kid's life experience matters more than what curriculum you pick, and it's really hard to screw up the academic side of things today. Just controlling the reading assignments is a big improvement. And if you're worried about making sure the basics are covered, just get them into college classes (local or distance learning) as fast as possible and once they've CLEPed out of or passed the basic college courses nobody can question what you did before that point!

[4arrows]

My wife and I home school our 4 boys, ages 8-14. She works during the day, I teach the boys and work evenings/nights.

The dark ages of homeschooling, of not letting your children outside for fear or truant officers and having to go to the YMCA for sports to socialize them is long gone. There are lots of good programs for homeschooling that will assist you to whatever level of involvement you desire. From co-ops that do all the curriculum for you and you simply moderate it during the week, to completely hands off-pick what you want from wherever you want approach. Much of it depends on your particular state's education laws. We live in TX and are free to pick and choose whatever we like.

We use a variety of different curriculum for different subjects and for the needs of different children. We also use a weekly co-op for some electives. Our children are active with us at church, with neighborhood friends as well as other activities that they are in involved in. Our children are helpful, respectful, and well behaved. We are regularly complemented in public for their mature behavior and ability to interact and carry on a conversation with children their own age as well as adults.

There are lots of options, and you will get a different opinion from almost everyone. If you are looking for any specific recommendations, shoot me a PM.

4>---->

[emtdaddy1980]

Thanks everyone for all the input so far. I really appreciate it.

[coastalcop]

Admittedly , my experience with homeschooled adults is a narrow margin, but I've found that those that had lots of outside influence were the most adaptable to change, especially in a chaotic environment .

I've had to train the "why" generation, and am still doing so. However my focus group is a lot smaller. Did get to see a little more a final review for the corps last weekend. Great kid at our table, crazy smart, full ride from USAF , couldn't get it in his head that he was wrong about a minor detail of corps life.... Wouldn't let it go..... Pulled him farther away from his peers .... I'm not all about "go along to get along". But in that ( wolf pack) type of environment it would have served him in good stead for,that issue. Maybe it's just my days working UC. But I pick my battles about what's important

[Boetman]

Howsit Guys

My boets two girls are getting homeschooled, with my little daughter(Kids give her 'babycollege', she is almost 2).
I tell you its great!!!
We are in the fortunate position where my mom are schooling them and looking after them. They are in a safe envirement (on the farm with a 12gauge in the corner) and my dad is in and out of the house all day, as he farms(he also carries).
So safety wise, 110% better than any kid waiting for his or hers folks to pick them up, waiting on the kerb outside school.
The actual study material is of a VERY high standard(had teachers in public schools compare it to there ciriculam). English is our second language, my boets 10 year old have already read 3 Cowboy/cowgirl books(I cut my teath on Louise Lamour and the Sackets), a feat I think is not to common for too many Afrikaans kids. My boets second oldest could read, write and do math before going to Grade 1, just listening when my mom teaches the eldest.
My daughter is picking alot up, new words daily, little things that is advancing her much better.
Non of them are anti social or anything, actualy the opposite. They are not scared of partaking in conversations or to play with other kids. They HAD a lack in the getting bullied arena, the eldest were bullied once or twice, but her uncle(which is me) explained that if he is bigger than you, and he bullies you or your sister or cousin, use a brick to knock his teeth in. Neighbours kid stopped bullying her when she shoved him off the jumping castle and explained that she aint his punching bag.
Sports is a difficult thing, you maar gonna have to look what there interests are, and then spend time and money to get it done. They like horse riding, so my boet bought them all the kit, and they are loving it.
Reckon my daughter likes shooting (my wife and daughter always watch when I train on sundays) she already points her little hand, and does a perfect 'dah, dah' controlled pair. She is getting an AR .22 hopefully at the end of the year.:yahoo:

You have to realise that it is going to take more effort from you, but the end result is worthwhile. I realised when my daughter were born, that I have been granted the greatest of gifts, not to climb mountains or become a world champion etc, but to bring her up in Honour Of The Almighty, and that is what I plan to do.

[SEANSTRAIT]

My daughter home schools her three, it has been a miracle for the middle one. The pace/set up of public school didn't work well for him, doing great now. My daughter did a lot of research before starting and puts a lot of effort into it. The kids are in a religion based co-op that gets together at least once per week. Plus the kids do community soccer and have other friends. I was a bit concerned at first but have been pleasantly surprised.

[eldon54]

The whole "socialization" concern is a canard. Would you rather have your kids socialized by hanging around a group of adults that you know and trust or would you rather have your kids socialized by a bunch of secularized kids their own age of unknown quality in the public school. I don't know what is natural about a 4th grader hanging around with a bunch of other 4th graders all day. Sounds more "Lord of the Flies" to me. I can usually recognize a homeschooled kid because they sound a lot more mature and grownup than their peers since they hang around adults all day.

[TFA303]

We've been homeschooling for about 15 years now, and done many things wrong and many things right. We started when Daughter #1 was in second grade, and she's a Junior in college now. It works for some people, and it doesn't work for others.

Lessons Learned:
- Don't get discouraged if the curriculum you're using doesn't work, or your kids hate it at first, or it's harder than you imagined, or you mother-in-law thinks you're insane. You're still reaping benefits far beyond what you'd get from Government Schools. Adjust fire, improvise and overcome. It's worth it.
-Involve yourself - whether it's reading the Bible lesson with them, or teaching the math and science - do something. Don't dump all the responsibility on your wife. The more you put into it, the more the kids see you as valuing education and the more you'll be leading them.
- Don't be a partisan. The curriculum you chose, the style of homeschooling you do, may work for you and not other folks. Just like with gun choices, the fact that somebody else chooses something else isn't an attack on you.
- Don't try to perfectly replicate a classroom environment in your house. The whole point of this is the ability to tailor your kids' education to your desires.
- Get involved with co-ops - but you don't have to do everything they do.
- Join HSLDA.

[emtdaddy1980]

^^^ "Don't lay all the responsibilities on your wife"

I actually blew muscle milk through my nose while sitting in the sauna on that one........... the wife has already informed me that "if you want those little viking savages taught at home them it's all you" -direct quote.

I'll be taking point on this one while the wife picks up some extra hours on the meat wagon.

[emtdaddy1980]

Just got back to the school and waiting to pick up oldest after already waiting there for 35+ minutez and leaving to make sure the younger one got in the house ok, all because these people can't properly coordinate a successful return from a field trip or manage to stay in touch with parents re bus running late. It's crap like this that reinforces my decision to go it at home.

[Jl808]

Good luck, emtdaddy1980.

A good 1-on-1 instruction beats 1-to-20 anytime.

My wife and I homeschool our son and while there are challenging days, the rewards more than make up for it. What are the rewards?

- academically doing better
- socializing better with adults and other kids
- opportunities to learn things not taught in school from parents and other adults
- hopefully, a close and loving relationship with parents and siblings

Homeschooling is not all fun and roses and has a lot of challenges. If your family circumstances allow it and your child has the right work habits, it is a real privilege.

Your homeschooled children will now have you and your wife as primary role models -- you have teach by example as well as instruction. You will have way more influence and opportunities to correct their character development than if they were in a school. Teach them well by being a role model for them.

About being socially awkward, I have not seen this yet. He talks to adults and kids way more easily than other kids his age.

Enjoy the time you have with your kids. You can never love them enough.

[steve_k]

The daughter of one of my old managers wrote a book about being homeschooled. I enjoyed reading it.

http://www.exploringhomeschooling.com/AudioExposed.htm

[Huntindoc]

I don't home school. But my wife and I have many friends who home school. I interact with these kids frequently. Tips I can offer from this outside perspective are: Be sure to set aside a separate area as the School area. People's minds do condition to their environment. Having an area just for study helps with concentration and focus.

Join a homeschool co-op or group. Still make your child raise their hand and wait to be allowed input. One issue I see in some (not all) homeschool kids is the inability to wait their turn and inability to keep themselves from interrupting others.

Consider private high school if available.

[ss58]

If you can afford it there are always great private schools available. Can't speak to homeschooling, I don't do my own legal, accounting or fly my own plane.

I was no teacher, my children would not have benefited. I think this a huge undertaking. If you're up to it…..go for it.